Ask Auntie Artichoke

Reflective,Responsible,Respectful,Reverant,Risk Taker and Resilient

Hello from beautiful Montana

Today we no longer worry about the 3 R’s of "reading, riting and rthmitic". We are concerned with the 7 R’s  of becoming reflective, responsive, responsible, respectful, reverent, risk taker and resilient.

I have the unique opportunity and blessing to work with the early education instructor who teach the children in child care, Head Start and pre-schools. I see a shift in education and methods of teaching.

Coloring inside the Lines is no Longer Important

The aptitude of how to do things is not as important because many of the things these kids will be doing has not been invented yet.  We are more interested in the attitude  and mindset of "I Can Do It" because they will be the ones who will be developing the careers, jobs and inventions of the future.

 Mindsets of the Future- the 7 R's  

 

Reflective    (able to see how their actions affect others, the ability to step back and look at new ways)

Responsive (able to communicate openly with others, to ask for what they want and to act quickly)

Responsible (Makes decisions about life and is willing to own them)

Respectful    (treat others as you would like to be treated)

Reverent      (recognize the intrinsic value of people and property in all cultures. 

Risk taker    (problem solver- know that for every situation there is at least 5                                 solutions- there is no one right way any more. Old ways may not be  the best. New ways of looking at old problems.  Help children know   that they are safe to make a mistake.

Resilient       (ability to bounce back from adversity and not let mistakes to stop                                             them from moving forward.)

Ready to Step Into The World

 

A child who has developed these characteristics is ready to step into the world as a mature member of society.  He or she will not only contribute, but also shape the destiny of the world.  They will be a catalyst for change to a better way; an example to others and touchstone for all that is good, kind and ethical. 

By assisting the children in our circle of influence to learn these values, we have given them the greatest gifts we can;

o       A strong inner guided character and

o       A deep sense of self confidence

As a community of caring adults who want the best for the children in our circle of influence, let's work together to teach the 7 R's of life.

In gratitude,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

http://www.ArtichokePress.com

PS: Be sure and sign up for the Momilies in the upper right hand corner of the screen. Short, sweet, little bursts of love and advice from an Auntie who loves you.

5 Tips to Self Confidence

Hello from beautiful Montana:

Our success in relationships, business, sports and spiritual endeavors is largely determined by our self image and confidence.  Those who exhibit confidence in themselves and their choices seem to attract good things, people and experiences to their lives.

It seems as those who have learned the tricks and tips of self confidence seem to be magnets for better treatment, more opportunities and deeper relationships. It is in our best interest to learn some of the ways that confident people think and act, so that we too may share the joy and good fortune.

Here are 5 Tips that we have incorporated in our family to build confidence

1. Focus on your strengths and hire out your weaknesses.  Of course you can do the lawn work, and straighten the garage, and run a business, but you are best at running the business. Barter, trade or hire others who are good at what you are not to do it faster and better.
2. Visualize yourself succeeding.  If you can see a clear picture of what success will look and feel like, you increase your chances of reaching it.
3. Ask for others to teach and mentor you.  The most flattering question to an expert is "Wow, I am impressed. Will you teach me how to do that?"  It is important to cultivate people who will help you to grow and develop your talents. Even the very act of asking is empowering.  Determine what you want and keep asking until you get it.
4. Replace negative self talk with positive affirmations.  Many of our beliefs and actions come from words or actions that others have given us in the past. They may not have been true then and they certainly are not true now. You have the power and duty to say to yourself over and over again  "I may have been Late (or lazy,disorganized,unkind,procrastinator etc.) in the past, but now and forever more I am choosing to be on time every time (or industrious,organized,kind, prompt etc.)
5. Recognize there are a number of solutions to every situation  There is no one and only way to do anything. People who get locked into "my way" thinking, lose sight of the creative, innovative and imaginative ways to solve problems.   

All of us have weaknesses and insecurities. The trick is to take a good look at how those past belief systems got there and if they are serving us well.  If not, then as an intelligent person who has choices in life. Choose to let those things go that do not serve us and incorporate those habits and beliefs that do help us to succeed.

The world needs strong, confident people to step up in relationships, businesses, communities and neighborhoods.  It is time to assume the mantle of confidence and esteem and recognize you have much to contribute and share.

I have confidence in you.

If you would like additional assistance in overcoming negative thoughts and actions, please go to http://www.encourageselfconfidence.com  for a powerful book and bonus items.  You will feel that it was created just for you.  And it was.

Love,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke 

Caring For an Elderly or Ill Dog – Pet Loss

“I wish people would realize that animals are totally dependent, helpless, like children; a trust that is put upon us.”

James Herriot, author of Creatures Great and Small

 

 

Facing the loss of a pet is very difficult. Just like their human counterparts, elderly and ill dogs have good days and bad days. The weather may have an effect on arthritic bones and joints and lots of confusion in the house may irritate an already irritable disposition. When in pain, they may want to be left alone and yet know that you care about them.

 

As loving owners, you will need to be tolerant and understanding as your pet goes this last leg of his or her life’s journey.  As the situation progresses, you will probably be calling your veterinarian more often and may even need to consider when to move from hoping for a cure to comfort care.

 

Comfort Care

 

Comfort care means COMFORT, not cure. Our scientific and medical cultures are trained and geared toward cure, treatment, and results.  It is often difficult to move from this modality into comfort care only. Our natural reaction is to help our elderly or ill pet as much as we can.

 

Such things as lab work, blood sugar reading, monitors, antibiotics, artificial nutrition, food and water, meds, continued chemotherapy, insulin and other result and data gathering procedures may need to be questioned as the dying process progresses.  We must ask what will truly comfort the dying, both physically and emotionally and let this guide our actions. The loss of a pet is part of loving a pet.

 

End of Life Care

To reduce stress on your aging pet, be sure that the bed is comfortable. We chose a sheepskin rug for our dog Taffy.  You may want to supply extra warmth through a heating pad or rice packs heated in the microwave.  Test to make sure they are not too hot, but just comfortably warm.

 

Because pets that are ill spend a lot of time lying down, it may develop calluses on its joints. These can become very painful if they become inflamed or infected.

 

Allow your pet to guide you in what they need and want at end of life.  They will give you non verbal clues to help guide your decisions. For instance, if your elderly animal shows less interest in eating, slightly warm the food or change the diet to something more palatable.

 

The level of activity will change dramatically as the elderly dog loses mobility.  Allow your beloved pet to take the exercise it wants, rather than what you think he or she needs. If sight, hearing and scent are deteriorating, it is easy for the dog to become disoriented and lost if left alone to wander.  You will want to stay close when it is not on a leash.

 

The Final Days

This may be the hardest and yet most rewarding part of your relationship with your pet.  This is your opportunity to return the love and devotion your pet has given you during the happy times of his or her lifetime.

 

Sometimes the final decision is made for you and death comes quickly or quietly to your best friend. However, if you must make the decision for euthanasia know that this is an act of love for your pet to help end the suffering and pain.

 

Always think what is best for the animal and you will make the right decisions and choices when dealing with an elderly or ill pet. My sympathy and support go with you.  Our family has been where you are and understands how you feel.  We found that this period of closeness with our pet became sacred memories and made us better people.  You will too.

With love and respect,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and speaker

PS: Please go to http://www.deathofmypet.com  for a beautiful eBook and bonus items that will assist you in your grief at losing a beloved pet.

Body Language – Signals for Success

Body Language – Signals for Success 

© Judy H. Wright, family relationship author and key note speaker

 

Most basic non verbal communication gestures are universal. When people are happy, they smile, when sad or angry most will signal unhappiness with a frown or a scowl. Babies are soothed by patting them on the back. Toddlers and young children shake their head from side to side when they want to indicate disagreement or they have had enough.

 

A shoulder shrug is another good example of a body gesture that indicates the listener does not understand or know what you are talking about. This clue or signal tells you to explain more about what you are asking, or put your request in terms the listener can get. Be aware of the signals for success.

 

Verbal Communication is the Language of Information

 

The words, tone of voice and vocabulary is important in sharing information. However, it is only worth about 20% of whether the client will buy your product or you.  Scientists have found that we are much more likely to buy from someone who speaks to us in our right ear. The words are processed by the left side of the brain which is more logical and better at deciphering verbal information.

 

Non Verbal Communication is the Language of Relationships

 

People like to do business with those they know, like and trust. Once you have established a rapport with the other person, they will want to help you succeed. The more you can connect with the other person, the more they will believe what you say and do.

 

Body language comes in clusters of signals and postures, depending on a number of circumstances including internal emotions.  Interpreting a number of signals is much more reliable than just making a judgment or decision based on one non verbal clue.

 

Key Elements to Watch

·        Eyes communicate more than any other part of human anatomy

·        Facial gestures-smiles, grimace, open

·        Hand  and arm gestures- palms up, hand shake firm, position of authority

·        Touch – safe touch for women, comfort and support, personal space

·        Posture – confident, shoulders back, how you sit in a chair or lean on desk

·        Movement – not fidgety or nervous, but deliberate

·        Appearance – congruent with what you are saying

·        Voice – modulation and tone varied and interesting

 

Trust Your Intuition

 

People tend to believe what others are doing, much more than what they are saying. If there is a discrepancy between words and actions, we usually trust their non verbal signals. So, listen to your intuition if it says something is too good to be true. It probably is.

In graditude,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and key note speaker

Boxer Dogs Make Great Pets

If you are looking for a wonderful family pet who is good with children, doesn’t shed much, easy to train and doesn’t require high degrees of exercise or entertainment, the Boxer Dog is the one for you.

 

This good natured dog is usually bouncy and playful, although every now and then you will get one that appears to be very dignified and sophisticated. No matter what their feelings are, they will show on their face. Yes, it is true. His face will express his emotions so he will tell you in non verbal language if he doesn’t like that brand of dog food.

 

History of Breed

 

Boxers are descended from sixteenth century European bulldogs. The name Boxer comes from his habit of striking out with his front feet when playing or fighting.  Today, he has been bred to be a kind companion for the family.

 

Physical Features

 

You will find most Boxer dogs to have the following physical characteristics;

1.    Stands 21-25 inches and weighs between 60-70 pounds fully grown

2.    Coat is hard and coarse and only needs occasionally brushing.

3.    Most Boxer dogs are fawn, mahogany brown, or brindle which is a brownish with black stripes.

4.    Those Boxers who have white markings on face, chest, neck and feet are desirable.

5.    Muzzles should be black, but many have white instead.

6.    If meant for show, ears must be cropped and tail docked.

7.    He has beautiful dark brown eyes which show his love for you.

 

Problems to be aware of in Boxers

 

Boxers are typically short-lived ( about ten years) and susceptible to tumors, digestive problems, heart disease, eye ulcer and bloat. He is sensitive hot, stuffy conditions and heat stroke so never leave them alone in a car on a warm day.

 

Death of our Boxer Mele Kalikimaka

 

When we lived in

Hawaii

, our family had a wonderful pet named Mel Kalikimaka (Merry Christmas).  He was the most loyal, loving, obedient and intelligent dog we have ever had.

 

When he was killed in an accident, our whole neighborhood mourned. It was a very sad time, especially for the children.  How we wished we would have had some guidance on dealing with the emotions surrounding death and the ripples of loss we still feel 30 years later.  He will always hold a special place in our heart.

 

 

Authors box: © Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and international key note speaker.

 

You are invited to join the community of kind, thoughtful people from around the world who enjoy the books, teleclasses, articles and free reports at http://wwwArtichokePress.com

 

If you or someone you know has ever lost a pet you will want to go directly to http://www.deathofmypet.com  for a wonderful sharing of stories, sympathy and support. You will find a well written compilation of stories, photos, poetry and guidance called I Lost My Best Friend Today – Dealing with the loss of a beloved pet.

5 Transition Tips for Back to School and Daycare

Hello from beautiful Montana:

Where did the summer go? I'll bet all of you are wondering the same thing. It is time for back to school and daycare if your children have been cared for by summer help. This feeling of newness will last for a few weeks, so be prepared for some resistance to a new schedule or transition to a new environment. Let's see if we can find some tips to make transition easier on children, parents, teachers and  day care providers.

1. Calm their first day jitters with encouraging words and open discussion.  Children are naturally nervous about new situations.  The more calm you are when discussing upcoming experiences, the less nervous and upset he or she will be. Ask them what questions or concerns they may have and then answer honestly and find out anything you don't know. Typical questions may be what time you will take them, where they will put their things, what they will have to eat, how and when they will get home etc.       
   
   
2. Visit the day care or school ahead of time.  Even if you can't attend a back to school night or event, be sure you visit with your child  at the facility to ease anxiety. The more a child is familiarwith the situation the less they will have to fear. Be very sure that while you teach them to be aware of their surroundings, that you also teach them to not be afraid.   
   
   
3. Let your child have some choice and voice in the decision making. No, I do not mean that he/she may choose whether to go to school or which school to attend. I mean that they be offered a choice of a red backpack or a blue one. Perhaps you could ask if they would prefer cereal bars  and a piece of fruit or a bowl of cereal in the morning.
   
   
4. Help them to be a good friend.  Most children are fearful that others won't like them or choose to play with them. Your job as a caring adult is to help them to be the kind of friend others will want to be with. As they learn to be kind, helpful, loyal and fun to be around, other children will be drawn to them naturally.  You may want to check out http://www.theleftoutchild.comfor additional assistance in finding and keeping friends. 
   
5. Model enthusiasm and a love for learning. Help your child to know that you and the whole family will be excited to share what he/she has learned that day. Set aside a special time to regroup (ideally at the dinner table) and share what each one of you has learned that is new.  This will help all members of the family be grateful for new information and it will reinforce lessons and ideas. This is very important as we want our young children to be eager to look for new and creative ways to solve problems.    

               

Transitions back to school,  starting pre-school or day care can be tough on everyone including parents.We need to recognize that many emotions  will be coming to the surface as we adjust to a new schedule and routine.  Be patient with yourself and your child and soon everyone will know what to expect.

As caring, loving adults we want to make the transition as easy as possible.  Our job is to help our kids to help themselves as they move towards personal responsibility and education. We don't want to do everything for them, but we do want to make it as easy as we can for them to succeed. 

You are doing the most important job in the world and I salute you.

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

http://www.ArtichokePress.com

3 Tips To Help Your Child Read and Problem Solve

Do you know the two factors which all successful people have in common? According to Jane Kitson aka Mother Goose speaking at a recent child care conference, it is the ability to read and to think in creative ways to solve problems.

As teachers, parents, coaches, leaders in community activities it is our best interest to help a child to read and to stimulate their imagination so they can think creatively. When we educate our children, we educate and empower our community with intelligent leaders.

Every Child is Ready to Learn

Even very young babies are enthralled with stories, songs and rhythms and nursery rhymes. There is a lot that children need to learn before he or she actually begins to read. A parent or child care provider can point to pictures an name them to the toddler. They will start to learn things about reading even if they don't completely grasp what the story is about.

When your child sits on your lap as you read, he feels safe, loved and bonded. He or she also learns that you enjoy reading and spending together.

Here are Some Tips to Teach Basic Reading Readiness Skills

1. First they must understand that letters are symbols and each symbol makes a sound.  Being able to recognize letters of the alphabet does not necessarily that toddlers are ready to read.  They will soon make the connection that sounds can be combined to make words...that words combine to make sentences..and that sentences have meanings. This is vital in developing language.
2. Build a bigger vocabulary by using complete sentences.  They will learn the meaning of words by hearing them in context of conversations.  
3. Build a love for reading by making it fun and entertaining.  As you read a story, stop and ask your child questions that help them to problem solve and think outside the box. "Wow, that must have been exciting to find the treasure. What would you do if you found a treasure?"       

Spend Time Reading To Children 

The more time you spend with your child reading, singing and talking the bigger his/her vocabulary will be and the more you will instill a love for learning.  You will want to spend time allowing for imaginative play, puzzles and encouraging creative thinking.

Increased attention span and imagination will follow when parents, teachers and child care providers limit TV, video games and other electronics that don't require much thought.

High Predictor of Success

Just as "Mother Goose" and other educators taught at the child care conference, reading and vocabulary are the highest predictors of success. So, just talk, read and sing to your children while you are preparing  dinner and eating meals together and your whole family will be successful.

The more children are read to, the easier reading is going to be for them.

In gratitude,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

http://www.ArtichokePress.com

Claim your free eBook on positive communication at http://www.useencouragingwords.com

5 Tips For Teachers and Parents

Transitions from summer vacations to daily structure of school time can be tough. For kids, parents and especially for teachers.  Teachers everywhere are thinking about the upcoming challenges that will be awaiting them in the classroom, playground, gymnasium, lunch room, faculty lounge and halls of the school.

No matter how long a teacher has been practicing his/her craft, there is a certain excitement about returning to a new year at  school.

The number one thing that determines whether it it s good school year or a great school year is parent involvement. Here are 5 tips that will help make parents and teachers work together for the success of the child.

1. Provide meaningful opportunities for parents to participate in their child's education. Get to know the families and ask them what their strengths and challenges are in being involved.
2. Help them connect with new or existing services in the area that can help them with specific challenges. 
3. Recognize that you are both on the same side and that is the team that wants only the best for the child. 
4. Understand that children change rapidly and judgments made last year or the year before may no longer be true.  Give the child, parent and teacher a fresh slate.  
5. Treat each other with respect.  You may find that there are those you don't love or like, but you do have an obligation to respect and treat with kindness.      

Children, teachers and parents are going through a transition and period of adjustment when the school year begins.  If each enters with an optimistic attitude and desire to have a successful and happy year, it is more likely to occur.

Children whose parents are actively involved in their education often score higher on achievement tests than do others who have greater ability.  Social and cultural advantages do not seem to matter nearly as much as having parents involved and working as a team with the school and specifically with the teacher. What parents do to help their children learn is more important to academic success than how well-off or educated the family is. 

Good luck in your partnership to raise bright, resilient, respectful and resourceful children.  You can do it. I have confidence in you.

In gratitude,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

http://www.ArtichokePress.com

PS: Be sure to claim your free eBook on Using Encouraging Words at http://www.UseEncouragingWords.com

IRS Tax Credit for Summer Child Care

Did you even know that you could take your summer child care expenses off of your IRS taxes? If you are a working parent or even one who is looking for work, keep those receipts for any of the day care or summer camps your children participated in.

This is not something that only accountants or rich parents know about. The IRS is trying to spread the world about the costs of child care expenses for children under  13 years of age.

Five Tips to Help You Save on Taxes

1. Summer day camp costs can count as an expense towards the child and dependent care credit.
2. Be careful though, overnight camps are disqualified. 
3. Who is your child care provider? Is he or she also a sitter at your home or a day care facility outside of your home, you'll get some tax benefit if you qualify. 
4. The actual credit can by up to 35 percent of you qualifying expenses, depending on your income. 
5. You may use up to $3,000 of the expenses paid in a year for one child or up to $6,000 for two or more qualifying individuals when you figure the credit.     

 Help In Figuring Your Child Credit on Taxes 

It sounds more complicated than it really is. If you need more information, including the rules for claiming a spouse  who is unable to care for himself or herself or a dependent young child go to the IRS website, IRS.gov

You will find assistance by checking out Internal Revenue Service publication 503, Child and Dependent Care Expenses.  You can also call 800-Tax-Form or 800-829-3676.

In graditude,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

http://www.ArtichokePress.com   Claim your free eBook on effective communication on our website.

Summer Fun With Children

Hello from beautiful Montana:

Children + Summer = Fun

Summer is a time for learning about nature and the out of doors.  If you and your children have been spending too much time in doors you may be tempted to turn on the television and become couch potatoes.  Don't do it.  Set a goal to be outside  and active as often as you can and having fun in the sun.

Active Play Increases Health in Body, Mind and Spirit

Different as they may seem, the mind and muscles are great friends. It is hard to develop one without the other.  A child's spirit needs active and imaginative play in order to recognize their capabilities and confidence.

Muscles need the mind to direct them in having fun and being active.  The mind also needs the muscles to carry out the great plans, games and adventures that it conceives of doing. 

Body, mind and spirit develop as a team from early infancy.  The years before school are especially critical for this important team to work together to establish brain pathways as well as self-confidence. 

Adults Can Help Kids Have Brains, Brawn and a Ball While Playing

Caring adults can help this development by encouraging children to explore the wonderful world through activities and games that stress muscle control and eye-to-hand coordination.

1. Let young children grasp your finger and hold on till they must let go; collect small rocks or bugs
2.  Let older children play catch; throw stones in a puddle, sit on the grass and kick balls with legs. throw pennies in a pail and all sorts of fun games. 

Develop the Large Muscle Groups With Simple Activities

As you plan activities or give suggestions for free play, remember you don't need expensive toys or lessons in order to strengthen the large muscle groups.  Here are the seven different ways these muscles groups are built.  Think of fun thingbodys that will increase their coordination and sense of self.

• Strength
• Balance 
• Flexibility 
• Endurance 
• Projection 
• Coordination 
• Relaxation   

  
Summer time is a great time to play outside with your children.  While you are building their bodies and brains, you are also building memories.  You are showing them with your presence how important they are to you and how much you enjoy spending time with them.

Good Luck, you do an important work

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

PS: If you are having problems getting your kids to help around the house and assume responsibility with chores, you will want to check out http://www.kidschoresandmore.com    You will be glad you did.  

Young Children Learn Through Play and Experience

Young children learn through experience gained in playing situations.  This play can be structured and aided by care givers or you can let the baby take the lead and you follow along to reinforce what they are learning.

Children are born knowing six to eight emotions

All the other emotions and feelings must be learned from the environment or directly from caregivers. Playing games is the best way to teach concepts and get their attention while making learning a fun and bonding experience.

Teach infants and toddlers to express the emotions they were born with.

The basic emotions we are all born with are:

• joy
• acceptance 
• fear 
• anticipation 
• disgust 
• anger 
• surprise                

You will have many opportunities to teach your young child to recognize and name different emotions as you are holding or sitting nearby.  Begin with something as simple as opening your eyes wide.  Now watch for the reaction and wait to see if he/she will imitate this expression.

Reward them with a big smile and see if the smile is returned. Naming the feelings is very important, because many adults were never allowed to feel or show deep emotions.  Therefore, they do not excel at reading body language, a crucial part of communication, or are unable to describe accurately how they feel. 

Playing Games with Children Helps Development

Games and safe interactions increases face-to-face interactions between children and trusted adults.  This serves to build social and emotional development as well as brain activity. 

When you play and learn with young children, they learn to understand a wide vocabulary.  They also develop language and hearing skills which benefit them throughout life.

Movement Experience Develops Strong Bodies

Activities which include movement fosters development of strong bones, muscles and increasing brain pathways.  Games that require children to use their hands can encourage small muscle control and eye hand coordination. This is a valuable tool when it is time to begin coloring, writing or using the computer.

Build Imagination and You Build Brain Power

Young children learn through experience and they experience night and day 365 days a year. Make a commitment to encourage imagination at least once when the sun is out and once when the sun is down and you will have had a significant interaction with your child.

As you help them explore different concepts, emotions or games twice a day, both you and your child will learn, grow and develop.

Good luck, you do an important work.

Love,

Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship author and keynote speaker

http://www.ArtichokePress.com